April 19, 2020
I'm back after what seems like eons of total exaggerated internal wars regarding will or won't I sit and write, self-blocking issues. Many bird walks in my mind, b'sing with the neighbor, which gets me to today's experience, so far, 'cuz during the b'sing as I was attempting to describe how my body was reacting to Levofloxin. I couldn't think of a descriptive word to describe how I was feeling. I did a little wavy dance to illustrate my condition. And my neighbor said, "Rubbery." Bingo, on the mark.
April 21, 2020
Although I really appreciated my neighbor's acumen my brain kept on looking for an additional descriptor and just before bed last night my brain suggested ‘wobbly,’ which fits well with ‘rubbery.’ Together they describe my state of muscle control rather well. I don’t like it. Definitely having a control issue(s), meaning who’s in control me or the drug? Me says me. The drug seems to be prevailing. Rats!! Getting up, walking somewhere, have their challenges now. “Oh, we’re going over here now?” The middle of the road to the side in 3 rubbery, wobbly, steps. We be staggering now. And so, go the walks I’ve taken, unless it’s a walk down to the river with Lizzie, then its mini steps down the 10% gradient road and twice (do I hear 3 times) as many to get back up the road. I rest after these efforts.
April 23, 2020
I had written a whole different paragraph previously but then, I did some grandly unconscious maneuver causing the whole document to disappear into the ether. I was also experimenting with a new word processor, MS Word, at the time, and was still learning the state of word processors today versus yesterday when I made the doc disappear.
Ringmaster/announcer
“And, Ladies and Gentlemen what has the gentleman participant won?”
(a pause while the ringmaster pulls the prize from the magic hat.)
Ringmaster/announcer
“Ladies and gentlemen our most recent player has won another pain in the ass search of his hard drive for a missing document! Congratulations to you, sir.”
(The prize is passed to the Gentlemen/Participant)
Ringmaster/announcer
From the bottom of my heart sir, I most sincerely believe, and, our viewers too, are behind you all the way, I wish only the best outcome for you and your missing document.
Gentlemen/Participant
Oh, thank you so much. I’m feeling appreciated and oh so much better. Wow a ‘get a second chance’ prize. Thank you, thank you, you’re too kind. I even have permission to not even try to remember what the initial paragraph content was. How thoughtful.
And here I am creating a something now which, has nothing to do with the purported initial start at today’s entry. Purported? You have not seen the first entry attempt and won’t be.
OK, so let’s talk about lymphoma. Today is Thursday. I had Cycle 2, Day 8, treatment Tuesday. It was a real wham, bam, thank you, ma’am. And off to Portland to meet with an OHSU Oncology STEM cell doctor. The OHSU program are the Kaiser provider/contractor for STEM cell services. We drove straight to the Kaiser Interstate South building where I thought I would be meeting with the doctor face to face. Check in provided the coup de grace across the chops. It’s a phone interview. I use the calendar Kaiser to sync with my calendars. A detail specifying it was a phone interview was left out of the Kaiser web calendar. Got back in the car and headed home. Dameon is doing all the driving this day. On the way home I remember having a hankering for a nice steak. I called ahead to the Markum Inn and ordered two steak dinners. Markum Inn only had one 8-ounce sirloin left. I said we’d take the one and call it two when I cut off what I think I could consume at home. Really hit the spot, a great cut cooked to my liking and just melted in my mouth. Real mashed potatoes, au jus and fresh greens salad with homemade dressing. Back at the beginning of this day’s events I mentioned the speed at which I proceeded thru my infusion. The day started rough. I threw up, or rather, experienced the dry eh3eaves. The dry heaves is how I started the day. The foregoing experience was my first throwing up other than forcing a cup of strong black coffee down my gullet one morning. Anyway, the day started with a challenge. I was real late getting ready (slow moving) for my infusion appointment. I was, in fact, late arriving for my pre-assigned time. I had prevaricated taking my Levofloxin this morning and ended up not taking it and another OTC they would like me to take before infusion. When I mentioned I had not taken my Levofloxin my Oncology RN suggested take it this evening. The RN’s suggestion fit with my thinking as to when I would prefer to take Levofloxin. I have shared previously how I dislike the side effects of the drug. To mitigate awake time side effects, I wondered to myself if taking the drug in the evening instead of the morning would make al difference.
April 24,2020
Subjectively speaking, switching to evening ingesting of the Levofloxin does seem to have mitigated the unwanted side effects. I still experience rubbery, wobbliness, but not to the degree experienced earlier. Neuropathy in the fingertips comes and goes. Some days the thumb, index finger and middle finger are all equally tingly. Another day, only the 3 digits on the right hand were tingly. The left felt quite normal. Do I even know what normal is these days? Another day, both hands are tingly at the thumbs, only. My Oncology doctor has suggested I use a vitamin E derivative, Alpha Lipoic Acid, to help combat the neuropathy. The OTC prescription was to take 600 mgs 3 times per day. I had previously set up my Lymphoma medication with one of the AM and PM pill organizers. Setting up a third time to take a pill in my head seemed a stretch for my cancer brain. Having worked with the twice a day for a few weeks I think I need to add the third pill. I’m thinking the extra 600mgs will produce, hopefully, consistent improvement in the fingertips. I have even figured out when I will take it. Just before bed.
My overall sense of self is a general feeling of lassitude, especially in the mornings. Sleep has improved. No mid-sleep urinary relief efforts required the last few nights. I stay in bed in the mornings either to sleep more or just lay there in my blanket womb. Eventually even the deep, abiding comfort of the blanket womb cannot overcome the ache of laying on the same body part for way too long. I must get up. I move myself to my second home, my recliner. Then begins, what seems like a long process, especially the last few days, of my body waking up and a full state of consciousness is achieved. Usually requires at least an hour of reding the news, drinking water, taking the morning meds and drinking a cup of coffee. Sometimes it has been a 2-hour process. Mentioned earlier this week and recorded above, Tuesday was a challenge, not only was I dealing with morning nausea for the first time, I had to get dressed for medical appointments and I was being real passive aggressive with myself. Move ever so slowly, only think about various activities half-way, and forget to do some activities because they have expectations attached. The lassitude can carry over to the next day. My cycling experience has led me to plan for a recovery day after hard exertions. Tuesday was a hard exertion so Wednesday became a rest day. The recliner was full of me most of the day. I don’t believe I went for a walk outside. Thursday, I walked to the mailbox, down to the river and back, and down the lane to see if a for sale sign has popped up at recently vacated home. Today, after a more normal wake-up (only an hour required) Lizzie and I walked to the mailbox, then with Dameon in the truck to the post office and home. And here I am finishing this blog entry started several days ago and folded into one longish entry. Successive blog entries may be shorter and more timely (we’ll see).
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